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M y ex husband was repeatedly unfaithful. I always forgave him, blaming my own failings, until he eventually left me for his mistress while I was pregnant with our third child.

That was 13 years ago, and I have been celibate, against my wishes, ever. I suppose I am a female incel.

These days, the thought of even trying to talk to a man brings on a panic attack. My husband was my first and only boyfriend.

I have been single ever since he left. No dates, no kisses.

I was always unattractive, and now I have a three-baby, gravity-and-comfort-eating shaped body. More bits sag and wobble than anyone could want to touch, but I am desperate for a touch, especially now that hugs from the children Desperate women in gakombe more to humour me than gakimbe.

It is incredibly lonely and I miss sex desperately, but I am ageing, unconfident, unloved. The future feels very long and very.

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